I really, really don't like puppy love/infatuation/whatever your favorite name for it is. You've seen the prototype - the man (the worst cases happen to the "macho" ones) falls head over heels in love with the girl of his dreams, and becomes pretty much consumed and obsessed. Almost every Facebook status mentions their "significant other". They are constantly talking or writing to each other. They want to spend all their time with each other. There's a time and place for romance - like after engagement and marriage - but some of what I've seen is just plain sickening. Maybe I'm just different. Or maybe, my time hasn't come yet. ;-) Of one thing am I certain - I want a guy who is obsessed and crazy about the Lord, not about me. I don't want some superficial love, full of silly nothings. Someone like Mr. Knightly - though he loves Emma, he isn't afraid to chasten her when she has sinned. I want a biblical love, one focused on encouraging spiritually, loving unconditionally, and becoming more like Christ.
That being said, here is a recent article on love that I enjoyed. My favorite is the list comparing infatuation and biblical love: http://ylcf.org/2009/11/what-true-love-is/
Thanks for the article Jessica! Very true!
ReplyDeleteI think I've known real love, and it doesn't have to be the infatuation you described. So you have the testimony of at least one that it's not just that your time hasn't come. I've also seen plenty of couples that have real love, so I don't think you're off target by calling for something different.
ReplyDeleteThe biggest problem is not that they show this affection, I believe the Bible calls (at least men) to love their wives lavishly (as Christ loved the church). However, today there is a huge confusion about what stage the relationship is at and what is appropriate at what stage. Our culture is saying that everything even physical affection consummated is appropriate anytime from barely meeting them onward. The church unfortunately doesn't go very far away from that, all they bar is that ultimate physical affection consummation before marriage. However, the Bible says things like, "Flee lust." This precludes a lot of physical affection before marriage, and especially before engagement. People today are scared of laying down hard and fast rules for fear of being called legalists. However, there are a lot of even common sense rules that can and should be placed in order to keep ourselves from temptation. One clear example is kissing on the lips before engagement even. That's like saying I'm not tempted to engage in sexual activity by sleeping in the same bed with you. Ridiculous!
Anyway, now you have lively rant to liven up your blog! ; )
Katie, you're welcome! I enjoyed seeing them compare/contrast the two.
ReplyDeleteIsaiah, that's reassuring! ;-) I completely join in on your rant. I am sick and tired of being bombarded with people who act like they're engaged/married, and yet there is no firm commitment there. I have to resist the urge to go dig a hole and live under a rock. ;-) I realize there are other out there who strive for the same high ideals that I have, but sometimes it feels that they are much too few and far between. I shall stop myself now before I get started. I could probably write a book on the topic!